The Tudor Rose: 2008

Kate Mc

24Dec2008

Not much new to report in my world, I'm afraid.

Fell on some stairs a while ago and may have injured my wrist - on a nurse's advice I have it splinted and am carefully observing - if the pain isn't gone by next week, I'll have to go in to a doctor and see about X Rays or something of the sort (joy). Making it difficult to type, I'm afraid.

Going home tonight, so will be offline for a few days.

Happiest of Christmases to everyone!

Labels: Christmas, life 1 comments |

Of expeditions

Kate Mc

06Dec2008

I've said it before. I'll say it again.

I hate shopping.

I live in the city with the world's largest shopping mall. It's huge. It has a lot of stuff I don't need. But when it comes to getting everything I need all in one spot - it's about as good as it gets. Most of the year, I'll wander in, wander around, get what I want, and wander out. Yeah, it's busy. It's a tourist attraction, after all. But it's convenient. Veni, vidi, vinci, really.

So I look at every trip to that mall as a mission, really (unless I'm going with friends for something not-shopping-related). I have actually been known to sit down with the interactive map available on their website, and plot my strategy, so-to-speak.

Today was simple. Everything I needed was on lower level. I got there shortly after everything opened. I was out less than two hours later. It was an almost-perfect mission (I doubled back on my tracks only once).

I have, however, come to some very strong conclusions. Many of which I've stated before (although not on this blog). So here they are again.

Pets should not be permitted in the mall. It's already pretty squishy in there, without you needing to bring your matching dogs along for the trip. Seriously. What do you dogs need at the mall? And if you weren't going to leave them in the car, why did you ever bother to bring them along? (Service dogs are, of course, exempted from this statement)
They should paint traffic lines down the aisles in both the stores and the hallways. If I'm walking on the right-hand side, you should NOT be walking straight towards me. Stick to YOUR right, for god's sake. I'm even for traffic lights at intersections, if it comes to that. I'm sick of being cut off only to discover that I'm stuck behind the slowest person in the mall. Speaking of which...
There should be both a maximum and a minimum speed limit inside the mall. If you can't keep up to a half-decent walking pace, get out. I would like to be able to get from one store to another in less than a minute, please, especially when the stores are right next to each other. And I also say maximum, because I realize I'm a fast walker, and that I probably piss people off by nearly stepping on their heels all the time. So yes, I realize that to a certain extent, I'm contributing to the problem.
Children should be kept on leashes. I'm quite serious about this. Not only have I nearly run over escaping children, but escaping children have nearly run over me. My mother occasionally used one of those leash things on me, and I turned out ok (although I realize this point is probably debatable).
Children shoud NOT be forced to sit on Santa's knee if they're crying. You're not going to get a good photo, and you should probably focus on what's pissing the kid off/why they're tired/what's scaring them. I mean, a big guy coming down the chimney can be pretty scary, a violation of safety really. How many times do you tell kids not to talk to strangers, not to let people touch them, etc., and then you're FORCING them into interacting with this creepy guy? And if it's nap time, for god's sake, it's nap time. You should have tried to get to the mall earlier. Save all our eardrums, please, and realize that the pic with Santa isn't worth it.
People in the stores should bloody well learn that they're there to serve customers. Suprisingly enough, I had great service in most of the stores I was in today. The stores where I had crappy service? All staffed by young people. Since when did being under the age of 25 mean that you got away with ignoring customers and poor attitude? Not impressed. When I was working retail, if I'd behaved that way, I'd have been reprimanded. And probably fired. We can't just blame the poor customer service on the level of employment in this province any more - there's something wrong with the culture.
Muzak does not make me want to shop more. If you're going to play music in your store, at least make it decent.

And that is all for now.

P.S. - most of the Christmas shopping is now done.

Labels: Christmas, dreams, shopping 2 comments |

Of music

Kate Mc

25Nov2008

So I've been horribly remiss in updating the blog, as per usual. I've come to the conclusion that now that I'm back in Canada, and have been for a couple of years, my life is pretty boring and not necessarily the sort of thing that people would want to read about. And I don't feel that I have a driving purpose in life to blog about, like some other folks I know. And yet somehow I still have a fairly loyal handful of readers out there, and I do feel sort of neglectful of you.

So here's the whine for this post - I'm getting sick. Sore throat, sniffles. Blech. Ah well. At least it's happening now, and not earlier. Fortunately no choir practice for me tonight as I'm not singing the next concert due to an upcoming business trip to Ottawa (last time I did a concert the night before a business trip, I never really recovered, and was cranky the entire time).

So what's been up for the last couple of weeks? Work, mostly, but also music. On the 21st, my choir performed Handel's "Solomon" with the Alberta Baroque Ensemble and a selection of amazing soloists (hence the gladness that the cold is happening now, and not earlier). I thought it went well, as did most others, apparently. The choir director seems to have concurred, in spite of some very last-minute adjustments, and really, that's the opinion that matters.

Afterwards I went out to celebrate a friend's successful PhD defence. And he got to asking me why I joined the choir. And it took me a while, to be honest. I did have to think long and hard about it. I could answer immediately why I didn't join - to be social. I do have a few friends in the choir but they're very limited to a select number - just enough to give me a buffer zone. I go, I sing, I leave. I don't stay and chat. I avoid the social gatherings after concerts (usually 'cuz it's well past my bedtime... when you work at 7 a.m. anything after 10 p.m. becomes a late night... and not going to lie, average age in the choir is closer to my parents' than my own).

As for why, I suppose there are multiple reasons. I like the music. I know that sounds pretty stupid and obvious, but your average 20-something usually isn't into 'classical'. Hell, the majority of my friends don't come to my concerts, and I can totally understand that (although I sometimes wish that some of them would - no, this isn't a dig to anyone who was out celebrating or had other plans that night; it's not you to whom I'm referring). But for me, I've already gotten to fulfill one ambition - singing Mozart's Requiem - since joining. It's that sort of thing that makes it totally worthwhile to me. It's certainly not everyone's cup of tea. But I digress.

I didn't want my training to go to waste (I trained classically all through high school).

I missed choral work (I was in an awesome choir under the amazing direction of Dr. Mark Sirett, who was such an inspiration - I've always regretted that my family had to move away from that, and unfortunately the choir is now defunct - and was an alto section lead my first couple of years of uni at a local church, but hadn't done choral work since).

When I was still working at the University I was looking for something to keep me busy that wouldn't cost an arm and a leg.

And those are the big reasons I came up with, really.

And y'know, if the job makes me move somewhere else in Canada, with the exception of a few individuals, it's just the music I'll miss. Hopefully I get moved somewhere where something similar exists.

On a completely different note, Magnolia has mentioned a musical theatre project to me that might go up for this summer's Fringe, depending on how the lottery goes. And she's suggested I should audition. Which both scares the crap out of me and is kinda exciting all at the same time. I've not done musical theatre since Kiwanis classes in high school. I have no formal dramatic training. And in all honesty, I'm not sure I want to make the time commitment. The Fringe is not for the half-hearted, and I'm trying to save vacation time to go somewhere super in 2010. But I'm not going to lie. I'm intrigued...

Labels: artists., choir, dreams, life, music 2 comments |

Of Vancouver

Kate Mc

Which is where I currently am for work. Although I've not seen much of it. Honestly. Cab ride to the hotel. Inside of hotel room. Mall across the street. Meeting rooms in hotel. Last night I escaped and made it out for dinner with some friends and had the best catch-up chat I've had in a very long time. But of course, it was night, it was dark, not much to see. Today, more inside of hotel meeting rooms. Cab ride back to airport.

The worst bit is that I have no idea why I'm here. My boss decided it was "a learning experience", but I have nothing to contribute and don't understand half of what's going on.

Ah well.

Someday I will make it out here for a really for real visit. Someday.

2 comments |

Of frustration

Kate Mc

I finally got to see the friend from that last post for the first time since she's gotten back this weekend.

She met a guy while she was on training, and when I heard this, I was incredibly happy for her. And I still am, I guess.

But with the exception of the times when she was driving, she spent a huge portion of the time we were together texting, and I'm pretty sure a lot of them were to the guy in question, although I can't be 100%.

Granted, we were in a sort of house party situation so it's not like we were one on one and having an in-depth conversation, but it felt like she was totally tuned out, not only myself but the other people present, the entire weekend, which really sucked after my friend B and I made an effort to try and sort of make her feel special.

I know she's still probably not feeling all that great. I can understand that none of us out here won't exactly know what happened during her training, and we'll never be able to 100% relate to her circumstances, and I know that infatuation is a glorious feeling (being in the midst of it myself, and knowing that if that text message came I'd probably feel amazing - and no, I don't know if the feelings are reciprocated, but given my track record, I'm probably getting my hopes up for nothing, and yes, perhaps I am a teensy bit jealous of the fact that she's managed to find someone, but I wouldn't have minded so much if not for the behaviour attached to it... but I digress...).

Nevertheless, I'm feeling like there's this wall that went up while she was gone and it makes me sad. I know people change and drift apart, but I'm wondering what's going on with this...

2 comments |

Of dismay and being at a loss...

Kate Mc

29Oct2008

So.

I have a friend.

She tried getting a job with a police force, and for various reasons, it didn't work out. She was bummed. Seriously bummed. But we were around, we let her take things as she needed to take them and tell us what she needed to tell us when she wanted to tell us, offered support, advice, guidance. She picked herself up, moved on, and applied for another job.

I'm not going to lie, I feel partly responsible, since I was one of the folks who suggested this option to her.

She was sent home from training today for failing a test in their stringent recruitment process (by 4%. I understand that they have stringent cut-off points for these tests, but still... 4%? Could she not retake?).

I am completely at a loss as to what to say or do for her this time around. I feel that while I can offer support, that's about it, as my advice and guidance have obviously not been what they needed to be. I feel like I should be doing something, but what the hell is there to do?

2 comments |

Of Worries

Kate Mc

19Oct2008

So I don't know why Blogger won't show the date that I make posts any more, now that I've switched to the new template, but whatever. Hence the date at the top of the post.

I'm worried, my friends. And the bitch of it all is that there's nothing I can do about the worries - it's all beyond my control.

Dad's got another spot. Fingers crossed it's just that - a spot, and not the skin cancer again. But I'm worried about it.
Mom's overworked. To the point where it's actually affecting her health. She's always had low blood pressure... her normal is medically generally a bit low. These last few weeks it's been high. Not just slightly elevated back into the 'normal' range, but into the 'high' range, even medically. She's never going to earn a full pension - she hasn't worked for the government long enough - but if she retires before 65 she'll be penalized even further. That means nearly 6 years to go for her. I'm worried she won't last that long.
The program I'm on for work didn't do any recruiting this year. With the economic uncertainty, it makes me worry that we're heading back into the layoffs of the mid-90s again within the next few years, and let's face it, "indeterminate" status just means that they don't know your end date, not that they can't fire you. Hell, even if they don't fire me, they could end the program and shuffle me off to somewhere I don't want to be... And that worries me.
Going in to the doctor tomorrow to get the results from those lab tests (yes, I've put it off this long so I wouldn't have to take sick time to go and get them). And I'm worried about what those results will be. (Update - it's low iron levels. I now have a giant fistful of pills to take every day, but hopefully they'll make me feel better. 17h49 20Oct08)
Still haven't got the money back from my latest drug plan claims or my latest travel claims - and I could really use that in terms of cash flow (no, I'm not poor, but the raise only kicked in this past week, and between all the travelling I've done and charges I've had to put on various credit cards, I could use the cash). I'm responsible for paying off my corporate card, even if I haven't gotten my travel claim back - and that worries me.

I guess what it boils down to is that I'm worried about the future, be it short, long or medium-term, and there's not a lot a person can do about that.

0 comments |

Of business trips

Kate Mc

So. Went to CowTown and L.A. for the last couple of days to visit regional offices with work. Good times. I'm now exhausted.

Which may not entirely be due to exhaustion. I got a phone call from the doc's office the other day saying they wanted to talk to me about the labwork results, but that it wasn't urgent. I'll probably go in on the 20th. If it's my thyroid, well, we've been through that one before, haven't we? And we all know that having thyroid issues can screw with a person's energy level. Or, it could be my iron levels. I went to donate blood about a week after the lab work and they refused me - too low. Not horribly low, but definitely low. Or it could be something else entirely. I'm trying not to worry about it.

I knew I was exhausted because I was having the BEST conversation ever with the taxi driver on the way home from the airport.
a) turns out he knows my area of town. Used to park across the street from my building when he worked for IBM.
b) guy has a degree in computer science.
c) told the guy I worked for the federal government. So did he.
d) he asked if I was bilingual. Conversation shifted to French. We discussed (in French) hiring processes, various government departments, security issues within the federal government, my job, his previous jobs working on contracts for various departments, French education, etc.

And my French was suffering badly, as it does when I get super tired.

But that is beside the point.

So finally I asked the inevitable.

"What on EARTH are you doing in E-Town if you're a fluently bilingual visible minority, have a degree in computer science, and have worked for the federal government on all sorts of major projects. Not only that, but what the hell are you doing driving a taxi?"

"I wanted some adventure. The money's good out here. Things are good out here."

And I guess it is. Not once did he complain that taxi-driving wasn't making him a living. Not once did he complain about the cold weather or how much better things are out East. Not once did he complain about the people out here. Not once did he complain about the cost of living out here. He pointed out some of the pitfalls of the federal government's hiring process, which are very real pitfalls that I've experienced myself, and indicated that they were part of hte reason he'd left Ottawa to come out here - those pitfalls were preventing him from getting a real, permanent job, although we did reminisce a little about Ottawa itself. He called me by name (after he'd seen it on my credit card), thanked me for giving him the opportunity to speak French and vent a bit about the government, said it was a pleasure (and the feeling was mutual, believe me), wished me a lovely night, and I was almost a bit sad to actually get home.

Why can't all cab rides be that productive/instructive?

Labels: happiness, life, mindlessness, thyroid, work 2 comments |

Of eharmony

Kate Mc

So after my last post, I felt the need to see if I actually COULD get past all eHarmony's barriers.

Either they've lightened up in the last few years, or I'm not as "screwed up" as I thought I might be. I successfully registered and got my personality profile. I would post excerpts here, but it's not exactly organized in a way that's conducive to quoting out of context. And in some ways I think it's relatively inaccurate (or maybe it was my state of mind when I was answering the questions or something... I don't feel like I cheated and was trying to be more conservative than I usually am, but maybe it was a subconscious thing).

I haven't paid them yet, so it's not like I'll actually get to do any matchmaking (or rather, they'll send me matches, but I won't be able to communicate with them or see their photos unless I pay, and CHRIST - it's $60/month if you only sign up for one month... or, like, $240/year, payable all at once, there are better things I could spend my money on - I'm not that desperate yet), but I was amused that I actually managed to get past their screening, and just felt the need to share.

Labels: mindlessness 2 comments |

Of the last couple of weeks...

Kate Mc

So I was going to be really good and keep posting my journal entries as I wrote them, but it just didn't work out - I've left the journal at work (which, after all, is what it's about) and will continue to write as things come to me. This whole process is supposed to be about a lot of personal introspection, which is something I'm not particularly good at... but whatever.

So. Ottawa was superfun, even if I didn't get to play tourist. Lots of good people, lots of decent beer (oops, probably shouldn't have mentioned that - but don't worry, it was on our own tabs, not the government's, we're not wasting the taxpayers' money...).

Job is still going ok. I'm learning. I'm slowly doing as well. Yes, doing. Which is pretty exciting. I'm slowly gaining some responsibility. Although I'm still not 100% on top of what's going on, it's getting there. We're heading down to Calgary and Lethbridge next week to visit some of the field offices. There's going to be at least one, if not two trips to Vancouver (one may just be a fly-in, fly-out sort of thing, not even an overnight stay), at least one, if not two trips to Ottawa (one for training, one, maybe, for some conference with our department), and potentially a trip to Inuvik or Iqaluit - all before Christmas! Not that I'll get to see much, but at least I can add a few pins to my figurative online map -I've never been to Van or to any of the territories before.

Choir has started again for the year. We're doing Handel's "Solomon" Oratorio in November. More info can be found at www.richardeatonsingers.com. There are some pretty big names in Canadian music coming out to be the soloists, so it should be a great night.

I've started taking piano lessons again - apparently one of the biggest problems I'm having is just self-confidence, but what can you do? That will just take time to build, I guess.

I have yet again discovered that a guy I'm interested in is now in a relationship. And obviously not with me. Go figure (yes, for those of you who know me on facebook, this is the reason for my status currently). Probably for the best, given some of the circumstances surrounding things, but this is getting to be a pattern, and I'm not impressed. Anyone have any single male friends they can introduce me to? *sigh* Maybe it's time to resort to eharmony... Although I'd probably not even make it past the personality tests (just google "eharmony rejects" for more on how their process works - it's not exactly the most fair in the world, or check out this link: http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2005-05-18-eharmony_x.htm). At this point I just feel more defeated than devastated, which is kind of a nice change. If you can say that feeling defeated is nice. Ah well.

I have cleaned my bathroom. It is now sparkling. It won't last, but it's nice for the moment. I should probably tackle the rest of my apartment, but I'm not sure that I will.

Went out last night for a surprise party for a friend's going-away (she's heading off for a 9-week course at the beginning of October, so we likely won't see her again until close to Christmas). Had a great dinner with great people, went out dancing a bit afterwards... and was reminded why I don't go out dancing much any more. I felt old. And I'm feeling slightly hung over this morning, which can't be right, since I only had 3 drinks over the course of the night... I'm hoping I'm not getting sick.

But, in all honesty, all the minor inconveniences aside, life has been pretty not bad lately. I found someone to go to the gym with, and when your gym membership at the building you work in is only $40/year, I have no excuse NOT to join, really. I'm hoping that feeling a little better physically will help with feeling a little better emotionally. I've been making time to hang out with friends, and there are some that I need to get in touch with and arrange things (sorry, Magnolia, I keep meaning to contact you, I'm horrible...). There are so many new beginnings right now both in my life and around me that it's almost impossible not to feel oddly optimistic.

Labels: happiness, life, negativity, work 1 comments |

Training Vol. III

Kate Mc

Just hearing the word "conflict" makes me uneasy. What am I worried about?
- Escalating conflict to the point where relationships deteriorate
- Tension at home and at work
- Putting myself out there

Without censoring myself, I would complete the following sentence with...
"In the presence of conflict, I have a tendency to..."
- Concede quickly.

What connection can I make between my response and my Myers Briggs profile?
My introversion is definitely highlighted in the dominant ways in which I react to conflict.

Thanks to the KCSI theory, I learned that it is possible to be more effective when conflicts arise. What ideas struck me the most?
- I need not to be as fearful of conflict as long as I reflect on what I am going to say.
- The importance of "I" statements is as huge as ever.
- There are different ways of dealing with conflict, each effective in their time and place.

To become a more effective leader with regard to conflict resolution, I have decided to take certain actions. These include:
- Being more proactive in spotting conflict before it escalates.
- Not being afraid to be a director on occasion as the case requires.
- Learn to compromise more, whether in a cooperative way or a compromise way.

Labels: work 1 comments |

Training Vol. II

Kate Mc

So to continue from yesterday...

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator
Did I recognize myself in the results? What surprised me? What did I discover? What did the results confirm?
Hells yes, I recognized myself. I have always known that I was a fairly introverted person, more interested in facts than in imagination. Having done similar personality tests in the past, I was not particularly surprised by the results of this one. It simply confirmed what I already believed about myself.

Taking a step back, I reflect on my profile to gain a better understanding of who I am.
Where does my energy stem from?
My energy comes internally. I am an introvert. I rejuvenate by getting away from crowds and doing things alone - taking a long, hot bath, reading a good book, etc.

What is my automatic approach to understanding a situation?
I like facts. Details. Give me more information. Be straightforward. Follow the agenda. Do not make me rely on the abstract - give me concrete details and information.

How do I naturally arrive at an opinion?
I am a thinker. I need lists of pros and cons. I need to do things objectively and critically. Emotion plays a secondary role in my decisions.

What is my natural approach to action?
I need to create schedules, timetables, and deadlines. I prefer to have advance notice of things. I concentrate on task completion, and need ongoing feedback about results and achievements.

When I learned of my entire cohort's results, what fascinated me? Do I feel that different profiles will cause conflicts within the learning groups?
I was not surprised at where I stood in the group. I always knew I was an introvert. I was actually more surprised that there were other ISTJ individuals in addition to myself. I do not think it will be a conflict to work with these individuals so long as we use our differences in complementary rather than contradictory ways.

I identify the strengths and weaknesses in my profile. I define certain areas I will need to work on to become a better leader.
I need to work on my introversion. I need to know that it is ok to be more of an extrovert and to take further charge in certain situations and put myself out there at risk of criticism. I will need to learn to be more flexible and less reliant on rules and regulations and previous ways of doing things. I will need to lose my personal rigidity, to a certain extent.

Labels: work 0 comments |

Training, Vol. I

Kate Mc

So I'm Ottawa on a training session for my new job. It's only been the first day, and in all honesty, it wasn't too bad. On a completely random note, I had to buy new shoes, since I discovered a pretty massive hole in one of my casual sneakers. Which hurt. PST sucks. But what can you do?

I was hoping to meet some friends for dinner and such while I was here - it hasn't worked out as of yet. M and I were hoping to meet tonight, but he's all governmenty and important and such, and had to work late... P and M and I will hopefully all get together tomorrow night - bit of a reunion (P was my boss 6 years ago when I was still in school, and M was her boss... we all worked in the residences).

Anywho, back to the training. We did the MBTI (Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator) test, learned about each other, and generally sort of discussed leadership in the most general sense possible (how's that for a redundant sentence?).

It was all good, until we hit the last little bit of the day, and they handed us our journals. Our journals have a name. It's Latin for faithful. The journal has an introduction written in 1st person. As in, "Hi, I'm your journal! Write in me because...". And there's a page just inside the cover for us to colour. Seriously.

However, in the interests of participation, here goes nothing - I've written this in my actual paper journal as well, but it's always interesting to hear feedback on what others have to say or what others think about me and my experiences and their experiences.

1. Following the ice-breaker activity and after meeting my colleagues, what remarks affected me the most? What am I feeling right now?
After meeting my colleagues, and learning about their backgrounds and situations, their assignments, and motivations, I am feeling less alone than I was going into this. There are many similar experiences, questions, logistical nightmares, etc.

2. Who in the group caught my attention? Who am I eager to speak with? Why?
I am excited to speak with the other candidates that are closer to my age. My supervisors are not quite the same age as my parents, but they are certainly getting there - definitely boomers or very early gen Xers rather than gen Yers or millenials (for which I'm thankful, seriously). While they are certainly friendly, helpful, and kind, they are at a very different place in their lives than I am, and I'm glad to have some people also just out of school, also trying to figure out what they want from life, that I could see becoming my friends.
I am also quite glad to meet some francophones. It's been too long since I used my French on a regular basis.

3. I would use the following words to describe my cohort.

Fun
Outgoing
Intelligent
Motivated
Helpful
Enthusiastic

4. Am I ready to achieve greater balance in my life? What commitments should I make to ensure personal wellness?

Yes -

I will ask questions when in doubt.
I will do my best to leave work at work.
I will maintain my extra-curricular interests
I will take time to hang out with friends
I will take that couple of days off at Christmas.

Further thoughts...

At this point, I'm just glad that people are friendly. When I was attending the interviews for this position, there were a few people that seemed friendly and nice, but they were difficult to approach or to come by. I am quite happy that my cohort is so open, friendly, accepting of differences. Coming into this trip, it felt like going back to school. It was like... wondering if your classmates are going to like you. Wondering who's going to be your friend. Wondering if the classes are going to be too hard (so far the homework was pretty easy!). Now that I'm here, I think I'm going to be all right.

Labels: school, work 0 comments |

I'm home!

Kate Mc

And had a blast in SF.

Here are some of the photos from my journey:

Gorgeous flower in Golden Gate Park

The new basilica's spires towering over the roof of the old Mission Dolores.

Sea Lions basking in the sun

More of my photos can be seen by visiting my online gallery at THIS LINK.

Labels: happiness 1 comments |

Of San Francisco

Kate Mc

So I arrived here last night, about two hours delayed. I have no idea why out flight was delayed, but by the time I got to the airport and checked in, it was showing a 1-hour delay, which later turned into 1 hour and 40 minutes. By the time I took public transit and got to my friends A&M's house, it was close to 9 p.m. SF time (ie: close to 10 p.m. Mountain, where I usually hang out). Ah well, what can you do?

People-watching at the airport was entertaining - there was one guy in heels and a skirt and earrings and makeup and the like. Which, in principle, I don't have a problem with. I work with a transgendered individual, and she's absolutely lovely. Having said that, she does it right. She finds clothes that fit, that are fairly in style, that look good on her. She takes time to do her hair, has it cut nice and femininely, etc. Dude at the airport sure didn't. I was sure he was going to be on my flight (after all, SF is known for its liberal culture when it comes to that sort of thing), but nope, he got on a flight to Chicago. And yes, I'm using he to describe this guy deliberately. If you can make an effort and apply yourself, you get to be called she. If you look like dude at the airport, still dressed in a guy's shirt along with your skirt, heels, and makeup, you're still a he. :-S

I popped over to Starbucks at one point to see about getting a tea and something to munch on, since I was going to be sitting there a while. When I got back to my seat, a whole team of paramedics and EMTs is going to work on some guy a couple of rows over. They were, like, stealth squad. Totally hadn't even heard them come in, or heard anyone call for them, or call for help, or anything. It was pretty impressive. They worked on the guy for what must have been close to 45 minutes (I don't know - I was sitting with my back to him, and the did eventually put up a screen around the area), before wheeling him out, attached to an IV and an oxygen mask. I was still really impressed with their stealthiness, though. If it hadn't been for the people across the row from me staring over my shoulders, I never would have realized they were leaving.

A&M have a lovely place only three blocks from Golden Gate Park, which I think is what I'll spend most of the day exploring today. It's not the clearest of days, but at least it's not ridiculously foggy, so it should be pretty good. I think I'll have to buy a long-sleeved shirt or a sweatshirt at the concert tonight - it's only set to get up to about 16 degrees today, so while it's not cold, it's not exactly warm, either, and I definitely packed for slightly warmer weather (the weather network was showing the temp hovering around 20 all weekend).

Ciao for now!

1 comments |

Of vacations

Kate Mc

So.

The show is over. At least for me. It was good times, helping out backstage for some friends. I learned a lot about how a more professional theatre production than my grade 11 play functions - it was fabulous! Hopefully I can work on some more productions in the future.

Tomorrow I leave for San Francisco. I don't have much planned - I get to see radiohead while I'm there. Possibly the only band I would literally pay an arm and a leg to go see. But I only paid for plane tickets to SF, the concert ticket, and food and such while I'm there.

It's going to be great! I'm so looking forward to it. This is the first summer vacation I've had since I was in grade 11. I've always been working. Or working on a dissertation. While I've had time off, and breaks, I've never had a SUMMER break. Summer after high school - working. Summer after that, working. Summer after that, working. Summer after I finished my degree? Working. Summer after I finished my second degree? Working. Sure, while I was in the UK I made a point of taking some time off and doing fun things (a weekend here, a week in Ireland, a month backpacking when I was done my dissertation - and yes, the week in Ireland was the first real holiday I'd had since starting university), but during the summer, I was still working on my dissertation.

I shall post photos when I return!

1 comments |

Of freedom!

Kate Mc

Ladies and gentlemen, yesterday was my last day at my previous job.

I am now off on two weeks' worth of glorious vacation time before commencing the new job. YAY! I asked the folks at work to keep my departure low-key, and they definitely complied (thanks to them for that - although none of them read this blog!), although I still walked away with a small fortune in Chapters gift cards to fuel my bibliophilic addiction.

I can tell I needed the vacation pretty badly. Last night after work, I started to feel a bit ill. So I took a quick nap, but I'd promised a friend that I'd be at her birthday celebrations down one of the major bar-filled streets here in town, and had to be there to meet her around 6:45 p.m. We had dinner, and the stomach wasn't feeling any better. And the exhaustion was setting in. So by the time 9:30 rolled around, I was nearly falling asleep in my chair (after all, it was past my bed time!). A headache was also starting to develop.

They moved from the nice Irish pub where we started to another bar nearby near 10:30 or 11. No air conditioning. Pounding music. I couldn't take it. I mean, I'm not the sort of person who goes out drinking and dancing, getting horribly hammered and doing stupid things to begin with... but throw in the heat and the noise and the fact that I wasn't feeling well to begin with - it was either get out or pass out. I left and was home by about 11:30. I felt like ass. And I felt like AN ass. I've missed this particular friend's birthday several years in a row now due to whatever circumstances have popped up, and was really trying to make an effort to go out and enjoy this one. I know she was really disappointed when I left and now I have to figure out a way to make it up to her...

1 comments |

Of Sadness...

Kate Mc

My Templar Knights that I adored so very much a few posts back are unfortunately out of my price range.

I maybe would have spent up to 125 Euros plus shipping, but they're going for 190, and I can't justify spending that on a stuffed toy. Especially when I need to buy a new printer.

Ah well. Maybe some day.

For now I shall have to pine away in longing...

Labels: artists., sadness 1 comments |

Of Facebook status updates that never were

Kate Mc

Ever wanted to update your facebook status to say what you were really feeling, but then decided it probably wasn't a good idea to broadcast those thoughts to the world?

Yeah, so have I.

And yet I'm going to do it anyway, 'cuz it needs to happen somewhere.

The Tudor Rose:

Is sick of sleeping alone
Does not necessarily think that your kids are cute
Is ridiculously happy that you're happy, but is still so jealous she could cry.
's feet stink
Has the worst cramps she's had in a long time (apologies to any male readers)
's office is a revolving door - so many people are leaving (and no wonder!)
is #*&^%& #)*@#$&
Could not care less
Wishes that certain of her coworkers would just stay on vacation
needs you to get off you bloody high horse.

Having said all that, I'm doing pretty good these days. My work life is more or less balancing my social life. I've met the guy who will be my boss in a month and a half, and he seems pretty cool. I'm going to get to set my own hours in the fall, so as long as I average out 37.5 hours/week over every 2-3 weeks, I can keep working a compressed schedule. I know how it works so I get a day off every two weeks, so w'ell see if that works. :) I only have 15 more business days left at my current place of employment! Woohoo!

And it's the type of place where they won't care if I'm 15 minutes late coming back from lunch so long as I make it up somewhere else. Magnolia, that means we can start doing lunch again in September!

I went to Taste of Edmonton twice (ok, granted, the second time was just after work today to get some Green Tea Ice cream, 'cuz I don't get to Kyoto much...).

I'm looking forward to some amazing Indian cuisine at a coworker's place tomorrow evening, hosting an event on the History of Beer down at FEP next week, and having Friday off next week to go get a massage and my hair done.

I have the last two weeks of August off. I figured I'd be doing nothing of particular importance, so I volunteered to help out with a friend's Fringe show - that'll be superfun!

It's a little under a month before I head to San Francisco for a 4-day vacation, and I get to see Radiohead while I'm there! My favouritest band ever! And then I get to do some more vacation-y sorts of things, and then I start the new job.

Things aren't perfect, but they're pretty damn good.

Labels: dreams, happiness, life, negativity, work 2 comments |

Of small victories

Kate Mc

So I went to the cemetery. I was there for more than two hours. I went into the mausoleum. And it didn't really freak me out too much.

Or so I thought.

I did wake up about 3 in the morning, thoughts racing, heart beating quickly, breathing rapidly, thinking about that damn cemetery.

But it was nowhere near as bad as last year.

I was able to fall asleep again pretty quickly, and while I didn't get ask much sleep as I would have liked last night, I think I'll be able to do this.

I've asked to be the principle tour guide's backup, so I probably won't have to do the tour much more than once or twice more this summer, but it's reassuring that I can actually hold it together long enough to do it.

Even if I do have to drug myself to sleep afterwards.

Labels: Confusion, death, dreams, negativity, work 0 comments |

Of anniversaries

Kate Mc

So, I've gone back and looked, but I didn't blog about it.

A year ago today, I was having a bitch of a time. It was ridiculously hot outside, I wasn't sleeping properly, I was trying to balance three jobs... It was roughly a year ago (I don't have the date marked in my calendar or anything, but I know it was around the middle of July) that I got as close as I had ever been to a nervous breakdown.

I finished a cemetery tour, walked home, had a bath, went to bed... I couldn't sleep. For the umpteenth night in a row. My mind was racing, and my stress manifested itself in an intense paranoia of the mausoleum at the cemetery - it was like a malignant presence had followed me home and wouldn't let me rest. At about 2 a.m., I wrote an email to my boss and quit the cemetery tour contract. At about 4 a.m., still not able to sleep, I called in sick to work for the day. At about 8 a.m., I called my mother at work and arranged to meet her for lunch. I ended up sitting at a picnic table near Winston Churchill square munching on Taste of Edmonton Food, across from my mother, and bawling my eyes out. I made arrangements to sleep in their basement as much as possible for the next few weeks. The day after, I went and saw my doctor, who prescribed sleep aids to be taken on a short-term basis (there were 15 pills in the bottle, now, a year later, I've still got 9 left...). I slowly got better. With sleep and only trying to balance two jobs, I felt relaxed again.

My cemetery tour boss was quite understanding. I've been blessed with supervisors that are wonderful and empathetic. My supervisor at the U was the same.

Nevertheless, another summer is looming, and I have signed myself up to work cemetery tours again. I would like to say that I'm not terrified. I would like to say that I'm confident I can do this and that it won't negatively affect me. After all, I'm getting good sleep this summer (yay air conditioner!), I'm not trying to balance three jobs, I have a social life, I know that I have friends and family that are there to support me.

But that's one of the catches of having a mental illness, I suppose. Whenever I feel achy or tired, I wonder if I'm falling back into depression. Whenever I think of the cemetery and the mausoleum, my confidence takes a nosedive and I wonder if I'm really up for it. So far I'm only scheduled to be there one night, and with someone else, so we'll see how it goes. I'm trying to convince myself that I will kick this things ass and get past it. After all, the way to tackle a phobia is to face it and deal with it, right?

Either way, good vibes would be extremely welcome for me from about 7 - 8:30 on Wednesday night. And if you're interested, there's a super-awesome tour of Edmonton Cemetery (117 Street and 107 Ave) this Wednesday at 7 p.m. for only $5.

Labels: Confusion, death, negativity 3 comments |

Of amazing excellence

Kate Mc

I think I'm in love. No, seriously. This also proves just how nerdy I am, but I don't care.

A friend of mine posted on facebook that she had discovered these guys. And I want one. I really really really really want one. Or many. But one will do.

Behold....

The Knights Templar!

More information on these guys can be found HERE.

Labels: artists., dreams, happiness, history, shopping 1 comments |

Of choice

Kate Mc

So I mentioned a few entries below that I'm hoping to take piano lessons again in the fall. I've been to see and/or talked to five teachers so far, and have now narrowed it down to 3... This is where I need input.

Here are the options.

Teacher one is an older teacher, has been in the business for YEARS, but has admitted that she's cutting back and working on retiring. If I go with her, I could easily be out of a teacher in a couple of years. Having said that, she's worked with mature students for years, and has a special interest in injury prevention (which is great, considering I spend all day at a keyboard and then would be spending my evenings at another sort of keyboard). She is also a stickler for technical studies which is what killed me when I was taking piano before - that's the part that almost made me fail my grade 10 piano, and she seems like she'll push me super hard on that. Her teaching style makes up for some of what I've lacked in the past - learning about harmonic progressions in the music, and focusing on how those work. I have not yet met this teacher, but our phone conversation was super informative, and she really assessed my needs quite thoroughly. Having said that, I'm worried that I would get bored with the technical aspects and pressure in that regard.
Teacher two is younger - she can't be much older than I am. This means I would likely have the opportunity to grow with her, work with her, and hopefully manage to strike a balance. She has worked with mature students in the past, and has helped them to do what I'm planning on doing, with great results. She doesn't seem like she'd be such a pusher on the technical aspects, but having said that, I don't think she'd let them slide either. She had me play for her today, and watched for any major issues in my technical performance. She was very intent on not letting me get bored with what I was doing, but also on making sure that I'm able to achieve my goals. With her, I'm a bit worried that the technical requirements for the exam that I want to take might not get as much work, but I believe that we'd have the sort of rapport that I might not get from an old-school teacher.

Thoughts? Opinions? Both teachers are the same rate - $50/hour (which isn't as bad as it could be, but still at the more expensive end...).

Labels: Confusion, music 1 comments |

Of memes...

Kate Mc

If everyone else is doing it, why shouldn't I?

What were you doing 10 years ago?
Packing and just generally getting excited about my first-ever trip to another continent. I was headed to Europe in about 8 days for a month of glorious sightseeing with a bunch of my Girl Guide friends from northern Alberta. It was good times.

What are 5 things on my to-do list?
1. Clean the apartment

2. Go grocery shopping

3. Sleep (I'm off work sick today because I got a grand total of about 1 hours' sleep last night - and I don't function well on that little sleep. It wasn't my intention - I was in bed shortly after midnight, which would have given me a good 5 hours, but the damn partiers outside kept screaming and shouting... I prefer to have Canada Day on a weekend so I don't have to get up for work the next day. Works out much more nicely for all involved).

4. Find a piano teacher for the fall.

5. Eat breakfast.

Where have I lived?

Oakville, Ontario. Kingston, Ontario. Vegreville, Alberta. Sherwood Park, Alberta. Edmonton, Alberta. York, UK.

What would I do if I was a billionaire?
I think I would go nuts if I was a billionaire. I'd probably find a job that I loved, regardless of how crap the salary was, so that I wouldn't go nuts. I would buy my parents the retirement of their dreams in Ontario. I'd travel as much as the job would allow. My closest friends would get their dream vacations and houses and cars. I'd donate to charities I strongly believe in. I'd go back to school and earn my PhD and maybe that conservation degree. The possibilities are endless.

Who would I like to know more about?
My ancestors as well... I've hit some brick walls in that department and would like to learn more about the people whose photographs hang on my walls...

0 comments |

Of varied things

Kate Mc

So I've decided that in the fall I'd like to start taking piano and voice lessons again. I'll have a salary raise, which should just about cover the cost, but I'm still a bit tentative about the whole thing. 10 years ago when I was still taking lessons, teachers at the college I'd like to go through were charging $40/hour, and I don't doubt that that's gone up since. I'll be making about $400 (net) per month more, and if I take BOTH piano and voice, given that people are likely charging at least $50 or $60/hour these days, I'll be spending all of that money, plus a bit, right there. And I was sort of looking forward to the salary increase in order to save more money to buy a car or go on a nice trip or something (I'm thinking South Africa 2010? World Cup? Oh yeah!). I'm torn!

If I manage to get ahold of the voice teacher I'm interested in, then maybe I can arrange to just have 1/2 hour or 45 min lessons or something... that would cut costs a bit. If not, though, I will still sing with the choir, so my voice won't totally go all to hell. And that would save me some money. :)

I've spoken with a few piano teachers, and with the exception of one, they've seemed fairly nice. I have a meeting with one tomorrow after work, and am hoping to arrange a meeting with another sometime this week, and still haven't heard back from a fifth that I'd called, but I'm thinking that I may go with a woman I spoke to on the phone - she has quite a bit of experience in teaching mature students and in things like preventing tendonitis and carpal tunnel... which is important now that I'm "old".

I do really want to do this. I'm just not sure how. *sigh*

Labels: Confusion, dreams, music, work 0 comments |

Of weird neighbours

Kate Mc

So a few weeks ago, I got a knock on my apartment door. This is unusual, because the only time I get a knock on my apartment door is when I know someone is coming and I have already buzzed them in. Or they're trying to sell me something (even though they shouldn't be in the building in the first place). Not having buzzed anyone in, I ignored it. Shortly thereafter, another knock sounded, accompanied by a male voice calling "it's your neighbour across the hall!". Well. Curiosity now got the better of me, and I wandered over to my door, unlocked it, and cracked it open a touch, keeping my body well-planted behind the door in case he was some nut job. I poked my head around the door, eyebrow raised quizically...

"Hi, I'm your neighbour from across the hall."

"Hi". Eyebrow continued in its quizically raised position. I evaluated the guy. He's probably in his late 30s or early 40s, kinda skinny but wiry, moustache... Kinda Ned Flanders-esque, really. I kept myself mostly behind my door. My building's pretty safe, but I'd never seen this guy before, and I had no evidence that he's come from the apartment across the hall. The door was closed, he had no keys...

"Do you have any power right now?". Personally, I thought this was a pretty stupid question. I had lights on in my apartment that he can see from the hallway, and my television was on, definitely loud enough that he should have been able to hear it a bit from the hallway.

"Yup, sure do". I even opened my door a crack further so that he could see my t.v.

"And you haven't had any power outages today?"

"Not that I'm aware of. All my clocks are still set and such."

"Oh, ok." And he stood there a while longer as though he expected me to say something more.

"Sorry, can't really help you..."

"No, that's ok, thanks". At this point, he turned around and wandered back into the apartment across the hall. At least now I know the guy really is my across-the-hall neighbour.

About half an hour later, there's another knock on my door. Yes, it's neighbour guy again.

"Are you going to be around tonight?" Say what? My eyebrow must have been raised quizically again, because he continued... "I need someone to let Epcor into the building, and because the power's out, my phone isn't working."

"Your phone isn't working because your power's out?"

"Yeah, battery's dead."

The ultimate irony, of course, is that he had his cell phone out and was blabbing away to someone on the other end. Believe me. I heard him out in the hallway about 5 minutes before he actually knocked.

"Um, well, yes, but I don't see how you expect me to let them in, really."

"Well, can't they just buzz your apartment number instead of mine?"

"No, my buzzer number has nothing to do with my apartment number. It's a privacy thing."

"Oh, then what is a person's buzzer number?"

"Whatever the office assigns to them."

"Oh, right. So I could just tell your buzzer number to Epcor and they could come and buzz you?"

"I'm sorry, I'm really not comfortable giving out my buzzer number to people I don't know."

Inwardly, at this point, I was thinking "you know, most repair people have cells these days. If you'd hang yours up, save your battery, and have Epcor CALL you when they got here, you'd have no problems now, would you?"

"Oh, ok." And he stood there again, as though staring at me would make me change my mind. I slowly backed away and closed my door, while he resumed his conversation on his cell phone and walked back into his apartment.

Over the last several weeks, I've heard him quite a bit. He has a distinctive, loud voice, almost like he has no concept of an indoor voice. This is in stark contrast to the lovely eastern European couple that used to live there that were about as quiet as mice. Not that I mind, really, I can't control what people do in the hallways, and as long as I can't hear it when I'm trying to sleep (which, usually I can't...). But this does mean I have some familiarity with what his voice sounds like.

So a few nights ago, I'm asleep. I wake up at about 2:50 a.m. to the sound of this guy's voice in the hallway, obviously talking on the phone to someone, jabbering away about how he should go back to bed now, and then the conversation moves into the stairwell. Where it echoes. Right outside my apartment. Not impressed. And it continued. And continued. At 3:10, I finally got seriously pissed off, wrote a note "Next time you get a 3 a.m. phone call, I'd appreciate it if you don't take it in the stairwell RIGHT OUTSIDE MY BEDROOM. Thanks.", and stuck it on his door.

Got home from work to find "Hi, didn't get a 3AM phone call, so not sure who this note is for. Thank YOU."

Granted, my handling of the situation was probably not the most diplomatic in the world, but it was 3 a.m., I hadn't slept well the previous few nights, and I was getting sick (yes, I have a cold that makes my head feel like it's a balloon just waiting to burst). Like any other single female with a modicum of brains, I did not want to get stuck in the stairwell with some weird guy that I barely knew who'd already tried to weasle my buzzer number out of me to give to God only knows who. But damn, it sure sounded like him, and as I mentioned earlier, he has a fairly distinctive voice. There's been nothing in the few nights since, but I'm still not impressed. So anyway, I wrote a note apologizing for the misunderstanding. But next time, I'm so headed into that stairwell with my cell on and 911 dialed and ready for me to hit 'send'.

Either way, it's gotten to the point where I'm not even remotely keen to run into my neighbour in the hallway, again, in stark contrast to my first year of living here when it was a PLEASURE to run into any of them. We got off on the wrong foot, I'll admit it. But I like to think that it was the right foot, even if my actions were a bit hasty.

Labels: Confusion, life, negativity 1 comments |

Of change

Kate Mc

So the letter of offer was finally faxed to me yesterday. I signed it, returned it, handed in a letter of resignation at my current place of employ (effective Sept 1) and there you have it.

Starting September 2, I will officially be employed by a different government department.

I called up the person I'll be reporting directly to in the new job in order to find out what exactly the had in mind for me. I was definitely expecting a learning curve, but this sounds more like it will be a learning 90-degree angle. It's straight up at rapid pace and pray to whatever god you believe in that you don't lose your grip. I'll basically be responsible for a large, specific program that rolls around once each year, and encompasses most of northern Alberta, and will have quite a bit of opportunity to hang out with and learn from tons of other staffers and employees. It's scary but super exciting all at the same time.

And in other news, France is out. Sorry, Pat! Mais tu as encore l'Allemagne!

Labels: football, work 1 comments |

Of things

Kate Mc

So.

I still don't have my official letter of offer.

Having said that, they did sneak me a "sneak preview" copy via email on Thursday.

I start September 2.

And I won't have to move.

Heck, I'll barely have to move offices - it's in the same building, just a different floor.

Oddly enough, after all the worrying about moving and not knowing what the heck was up with everything, I'm slightly disappointed. I was sort of hoping for a change, an upheaval, and knowing that the possibility was there that I could have to pick up and move at a proverbial moment's notice was both a stressor and an extremely exciting prospect. I'd even sort of started scoping out places in the cities they might have sent me to. I was looking forward to catching up with people in those cities.

In the long run, though, it's WONDERFUL that I don't have to move (at least not for another year yet). My salary will be going up substantially, my cost of living only a little. I'll be able to save some more money. Buy a car or go travelling sooner. Take piano and/or voice lessons again. My office environment will be a little less structured. I might actually be able to take an hour for lunch every so often if I skip coffee breaks or stay a little later. I'm actually hoping to work something out with them so I can continue to work a compressed schedule, but we'll see how that goes.

In other news, my fantasy football team is currently sucking. But that's ok. It's my fantasy.

I really wish I was back in Europe and could just head to a pub and have a pint and watch the game. When I was there, even if I ended up sitting in the college bar at a table by myself with my schoolwork spread out in front of me, there was SUCH an atmosphere of fun, welcoming acceptance. It's pretty odd how football fans in Europe (provided you're supporting the same team) will just open their tables/arms/comeraderie to you. There was one day I went by myself to watch a friendly match between England and Jamaica in a pub in York. It was crowded (as I knew it would be), and I was prepared to stand. Instead, this lovely older gentleman from the North found an extra chair and a spot for me to sit. He continued to chat away as we waited for the game to start - wondering what his wife was out buying (she was in York for a shopping trip) and commenting on his favourite players (I learned more about Michael Owen that day than I ever needed to know). It's definitely one of my favourite memories from my time overseas.

I seriously hope that at some point I manage to get to an international competition like the Euro someday. I don't think I have any hope in hell for 2010 World Cup tix. :)

Labels: football, life, work 1 comments |

Of Football

Kate Mc

Ladies and gentlemen - approximately two years ago, the World Cup was on (see June 2006 in the archives for more on the ups and downs of watching the football and just how much that interfered with my schooling...). At that time, I wrote a guide for people who aren't bit football fans but who decide that since everyone else is doing it, they're going to watch the games too...

This time around, for Euro 2008, I fortunately have my own TV and am not, for the most part, subjected to this. Having said that, I felt it was time for a bit of a recap, with additions from friends and fellow bloggers after my post...

I. Thou shalt not invite thyself to the football, then spend the entire game whining that thou art bored. You chose to watch it. Suck it up.

II. Thou shalt not interrupt me when I'm texting my friends that _DO_ care about the football and with whom I can actually discuss the unfairness of the foul committed on/by player X and other such important matters.

III. Thou shalt not accuse the players of being shit when thou dost not fully understand the game. That privilege shall be reserved for those of us who know and understand the offside rule and what constitutes a foul and other 'obscure' trivia.

IV. Thou shalt not whine when thy favourite player gets subbed off - especially if he's only your favourite because you think he's hot.

V. Thou shalt listen to me denigrate a player one instant, then laud him to the skies the next without commenting on my lack of steadfastness.

VI. Thou shalt not interrupt me to discuss players' appearances. At least not when the ball is anywhere near a net. During stoppages in play, however, this is acceptable (hey, I'm a straight female, what do you want from me?).

VII. Thou shalt not tell me that the team that won did not deserve to win. Granted, they might have played like crap for MOST of the game, but in the end, they DID manage to score those goals. Although there has been the odd exception to this rule (such as the England-Paraguay game in the 2006 Cup).

VIII. Thou art allowed to ask questions regarding the workings of the game - the rules, why X got a free kick, etc. If, however, you have to ask the same question more than twice in a game, I reserve the right to stop answering and perhaps even make wicked fun of you for your lack of comprehension.

IX. Thou shalt not call the celebrations of all the others watching the game "silly". Maybe you feel no national pride, but I'm betting a lot of others in the room damn well do. This especially applies when you are talking about MY reaction, which was quite minimal when compared to others. You are, however, allowed to point out my potty mouth, as I'm well aware that over the course of the 90 minutes my language goes straight into the toilet and am endeavouring to remedy that problem.

X. Thou shalt not say the players are "doing nothing". I'd like to see you out there for 90 minutes, keeping the ball mostly in your opponent's end. If you must use this statement, please qualify (ie: "They're doing nothing! Their defense is totally missing!" or... "There's absolutely no offense out there!" or... "they're so not covering player X"). The players are NOT inactive.

XI. Thou shalt not whinge about the dramatics of the sport. Yes, all football players take a drama course called "Faking injuries 101" in order to make fouls look particularly deadly and convincing. It's part of the game. It just is. Deal with it.

XII. thou shalt not cry "kick it" or "hit it" at any point during the game. this merely shatters the illusion that thou hast any idea of what is going on whatsoever and reveals thou to be'est a charlatan of the highest echelons. (Contributed by Dr. D&C of http://thelostdoctor.blogspot.com/)

XIII. Thou shalt not take note of the fact that I yell at the ref. for giving too many fouls when he yellow cards my team, and then yell at the ref. for not giving enough fouls when he fails to yellow card the other team. (Contributed by Llewellyn of http://stillfalling.blogspot.com/)

XIV. Thou shalt not whinge and whine about the fact that a certain player has not been put on the field when we have already made three subs and said player isn't on the bench!!! (Contributed by my friend Bids)

XV. Thou shalt not say after watching Team X go down whille wearing your Team X shirt "oh....well ....usually i cheer for Team Y". Show some consistency. (Contributed by Bids)

XVI. Thou wilt be given a red card for breaking any of the solemn commandments. (Contributed by Genderist of http://haikuoftheid.blogspot.com/)

Labels: football, happiness, life 0 comments |

Of quick updates

Kate Mc

Well, ladies and gents, I have still not received my official letter of offer regarding the new position. Bah. Humbug. I did, however, get an email today from my contact. The basic gist of the email conversation is as follows:

Contact X: "Hi, Kate. Your letter of offer will be sent out on June 9 - we have most of the details down."
Me: "Thanks, X! Any word on where I'll be going?"
Contact X: "No."

Argh!

Having said that, I work a compressed schedule these days - put in a little extra time each day and get some extra time off every few weeks, and yesterday was one of those days off. I went down to FEP (www.fortedmontonpark.ca) to wander around and visit - only ONE familiar face in costume on the entire site - a bit of a weird feeling. For more you can check out the last few of Delly Bean's posts.

But mostly I went because the fabulous Delly Bean has been helping me to build a corset. I started this thing back before I went to England (and before I had a decent digital camera) and was making OK progress on it, and then I went away, and the corset sort of ended up on hiatus. But yesterday, I sewed. By hand, 'cuz there were tricky bits, but I sewed.

And here, after nearly three years, is what the corset looks like to date...

Front:

Picture with better colouring so you can see what the fabric really looks like:

Detail of the front. Those little channels are filled with wire-filled candle-wicking to give them a bit of supportiveness:

Inside (will be lined in a royal-ish blue material). The bar in the middle is iron (it was easier to find a blacksmith than a carpenter to make it for me, ironically enough) and will go in a channel between layers of canvas and will sit straight up the breastbone and down onto the stomach:

2 comments |

Of boredom

Kate Mc

Ladies and gentlemen, about a year and a chunk ago, I blogged about being bored at work.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Ok, seriously now...

When you've got nothing to do at work, what do you do?
I've got no students coming to whinge or ask stupid questions *knock wood*
I've got no paperwork to file (I'm dependent on my co-workers for that, anyway) or mail out.
The phones aren't ringing *knock wood*.
I've finished the project my boss set for me.
I've answered all my email.
My desk isn't very messy at the moment, so it doesn't need to be cleaned.
I've read just about every story on the BBC news website.
I've read the Residence handbook yet AGAIN in an effort to educate myself. I may go read the manual yet AGAIN.
I have to look/sound like I'm doing something. Don't get me wrong. In a month we'll be swamped with applications and I'll be whinging about being overworked - I know that's the case. But for the moment...
What would you do? Surf the 'net? Organize your desk yet again? Help!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

You know it's a slow day at work when...

You're looking forward to telling off the guy who hasn't paid when he comes in to complain about the lock change
You're disappointed when he comes in before the locks are actually changed
Your desk has never been neater, and new organizational supplies have been ordered (what would we do without Grand and Toy, really?)
You've read the emails in your inbox twice, just to make sure you haven't missed anything.
You watch your fellow employees file - only after you fought over who got to do the filing in the first place
You water the plant you've been neglecting for the last month
You haven't had to to say "around the corner, first door on the left" yet and you're two hours into your day
You haven't taken a single payment
You don't really need that free yoga they're offering to relieve stress, but you're damn well going anyway
You sign up for a free online HTML course because it's been two years since you built a website and you're feeling a little rusty. You also complete the first week's homework.
You seriously think about signing up for the free CSS course as well
You finally say "around the corner, first door on the left" 2.25 hours into your day
The only student that's had an actual housing question isn't even from our residence
And I'm sure I will think of more shortly, but this is it for the mo.

And then, miraculously, in September, I got the new job. It promised to be a job where no one was ever bored, because there were so many clients and so much work that we'd never run out of anything to do.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, they lied. The office has been the slowest it's been in... about ... 2.5 years. We're running out of work. I'm taking an online French grammar course. And 95% of the internet is blocked by our system's firewall.

I don't handle boredom well. All I can think right now is that I PRAY my new job sends me my formal letter of offer soon and I can get out of here into a job that's slightly more sane. And maybe even get my own desk again. That'd be cool...

Labels: negativity, work 2 comments |

Of music Memes...

Kate Mc

As Magnolia has pointed out, Music Memes are super fun.

Name your top 10 most played bands on iTunes:

Billie Holliday
The Smashing Pumpkins
Franz Ferdinand
Jem
Captain Tractor
Coldplay
The Feelers
Hole
The Killers
Sam Cooke

What was the first song you ever heard by 6 (Coldplay)? "Bigger, Stronger". It's a very early-radiohead-esque b-side that one of my guy friends had on a mix cd that I borrowed one summer we were working together.
What is your favorite album of 2 (Smashing Pumpkins)? "Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness". Classic.

What is your favorite lyric that 5 (Captain Tractor) has sung? "The words of that song/go 'round in my head/as I'm crawling along /well they might as well leave me for dead..."

How many times have you seen 4 (Jem) live? Can't say that I have. I really only like the one song, "They".

What is your favorite song by 7 (The Feelers)? "The Leaving."

What is a good memory you have involving the music of 10 (Sam Cooke)? Grade 6 musical, baby!

Is there a song of 3 (Franz Ferdinand) that makes you sad? Sometimes "Fade Together" will get me, but I have to be in a crappy mood to begin with.

What is your favorite lyric that 2 (Smashing Pumpkins) has sung? "Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage".

How did you get into 3 (Franz Ferdinand)? I'd heard they were good. I'd heard "Do You Want To" and liked it. I bought the album. The end.

What is your favorite song by 4 (Jem)? "They". It's really the only song by her that I'm particularly into, but apparently it's one of my most-played.

Is there a song of 8 (Hole) that makes you sad? No. Much like Jem, I'm only a big fan of one song, really - "Celebrity Skin".

What is your favorite song of 1 (Billie Holiday)? "Me, Myself and I".

What is your favorite album of 1 (Billie Holiday)? None in particular. She's just fantastic.

0 comments |

Of a fun couple of days.

Kate Mc

It's been a fun few days.

My birthday was on Tuesday.

We got carrot cake at work for no particular reason (one of the ladies I work with runs a cake business on the side...) on Wednesday

I've spoken to an NHL hockey player. That was awkward. You could tell he was trying not to let on what he did for a living, and I was trying not to let on that I knew what he did for a living...

I've spoken to a Canadian senator. Good times...

On the walk home this afternoon, I saw a cop blatantly use his lights and siren to run a red light when there was absolutely no reason for him to be doing so.

I also saw the most giant dog ever. Seriously. He must have come up to at least my elbow, if not somewhere between my elbow and my shoulder. I'm sure he was either a mastiff or a bullmastiff... anyway, he was huge. This in and of itself would have been mildly interesting, were it not for the fact that as I watched, two yuppie couples with their teensy little chihuahua-esque dogs were walking by. And the chihuahua-esque dogs were yapping away at the mastiff, straining their leashes, trying to have a go at it. The mastiff was pretty laid-back, so he ignored them for a while. But then, he slowly turns around, plodding on those massively huge paws of his, and makes a half-hearted lunge towards the yippy rats and gives a giant bark. For a moment, the yipping stops. Every pedestrian who can see what's going on has a massive grin on their faces... and then the yipping starts again. The mastiff was on a leash, but even the half-hearted lunge he'd made dragged his owner forwards a couple of feet. It was highly amusing for all of us watching, but maybe you just had to be there.

And that is all...

Labels: happiness, life, mindlessness, work 2 comments |

Kate Mc

I accepted the job offer.

Y'all are right. This is more about building a skill set than about building a specific knowledge base. This is about professional development that will last, even if I end up transferring into another field in a few years. This is about making more money, being more challenged, feeling good about what I'm doing rather than wishing the general public would go away and leave me alone.

Change is scary, right? Even if it's for the better?

3 comments |

Well, shit.

Kate Mc

I got a job offer.

I have no idea what to do.

It's with a department I don't really want to work for. If I don't take this, though, will I get anything better?

Professionally, it's a godsend. I mean, it's management. I may have to move somewhere else in Alberta, but from what I can see, the positions would at least be in this province - I might not have to move at all! Even if I did have to move to Calgary or something... I've lived further away before. The cost of living there isn't any more expensive than it is here, really.

They've given me until 10 a.m. our time on Wednesday to accept or decline the offer.

I don't know why this is bothering me so much.

My god. It's all fine in theory, doing something with my career I've never done before, but when it actually begins to realize itself? I'd just sort of resigned myself to being stuck at my current position a little while longer...

Dammit, I don't know what to do.

Labels: Confusion, life, negativity, work 3 comments |

Of pain

Kate Mc

So one of the teeth that the dentist worked on started to hurt last week. I went in to have it looked at yesterday. As a result, I am now down one wisdom tooth, up a bottle full of T3 and wishing I could eat really for real solid food again. Yup, they just took my tooth out right then and there. I was in and out of the dentist's in an hour. It was nuts. So I hurt right now (it's about time to take some more pain killers) and would KILL for some potato chips or something similarly salty and crunchy, but it will have to be iced cream instead, I'm afraid.

The first found of job offers was supposed to go out today and I haven't received anything. Ah well. It isn't the only iron in the fire...

Labels: life, negativity, work 0 comments |

Of photo teasers...

Kate Mc

Well, ladies and gentlement, I've done it. I've finally uploaded all my photos. For those of you who know me on Facebook, they're pretty easily accessible there. For those of you who don't, I've got them up on my old standby - Kodak Gallery! More info below...

Ok, so this first one is the requisite tourist shot of me outside Parliament (the Peace Tower, to be specific) in Ottawa. Notice the bright, sunny gorgeousness of the day - didn't last much longer. It was a cold walk back to the hotel after dinner.

This one is the Harbour Park Inn in Goderich, Ontario. Historic building of much significance. More in the photo albums...

The livery, another building of historical significance in Goderich, Ontario...

For more of my photos, check out my profile on Facebook or visit: The Kodak Gallery

Labels: history, life 0 comments |

Of even more exhaustion

Kate Mc

You'd think that three days with a 93 year old woman wouldn't be all that taxing, wouldn't you? But no, somehow, I'm still exhausted.

The trip down to Goderich from Toronto was pretty uneventful (stayed the night in TO with a friend I haven't seen in over a year, so that was excellent). You know how they say it takes you a few days to get used to a new bed and sleep properly?

Right, so that's 2 nights in Gatineau, 1 in Toronto and 3 in Goderich. You'd think the third night in Goderich might have been ok, but no. I am SO looking forward to getting to my own bed tonight. It's going to be a late one - the flight from Calgary (yes, I'm in Calgary airport right now - whoever invented wireless internet is a god(dess)) gets me into Edmonton at about 8:35 p.m. - ie: 10:35 p.m. Eastern, the time zone I've been in the last few days.

The fun thing about the drive down to my grandma's place is that you go by the house where she lived when she was a kid (although it looks nothing like it used to) and all sorts of other places that figure prominently in my childhood. Hell, the entire town of Goderich figures prominently in my childhood - we used to spend at LEAST a week down there each summer, hanging out, visiting, etc.

First thing that happened when I got to Goderich was that my mother handed me an envelope full of genealogy and family history stuff to peruse. I spent most of the evening, and most of my downtime in general whilst there working on that. I apparently have distant relatives several times removed all over the freaking place that I don't even know about. I think it's time to rejoin Ancestry.co.uk and see about picking up where I left off when I got back from England and was too poor to keep doing family history stuff for a while there (it's not ridiculously expensive, especially not compared to the cost of hiring a private genealogical researcher to do a lot of this stuff for you, but it was something I couldn't really afford when I first got back). Among the highlights were a copy of my great-great grandfather's will (from 1915) and invoices from the funeral parlour for both his and my great-great grandmother's funerals (in 1939 and 1935, respectively).

We ended up at my grandmother's cousin's place for after-dinner tea and chatting that evening (which reminds me, I need to alter a name in my genealogy program...), and when June, the cousin in question, got wind of the fact I was working on family history again, she dragged me up the stairs of her wonderfully Victorian house (it's beautiful. Seriously. The inside (on the main floor, anyway) hasn't been much altered since Victorian times, and June has furnished it in a way that's commensurate with that). I walked away with some more info about her branch of the family, but most special was walking away with a copy of my great-great grandmother's funeral announcement from 1935. Black-bordered and everything. You look at it and it LOOKS old.

It was at this point that we returned to my grandmother's place and my mother mentioned something about remembering having had copies of funeral announcements and calling cards and such from my great grandmother's generation. My grandmother's response... "Oh, I think I threw those out". This spawned a giant search through grandma's apartment on the part of my mother (who is also into the family history stuff)... and no calling cards or funeral announcements. Conclusion - My grandmother had, in fact, thrown them out. They may be in a box of stuff at my parents' house, but it's highly unlikely.

We did, however, find a photograph. On the surface that's not that special, but those of you who've been in my place will know that I have various (copies of) old family photos (originals in my mom's possession) framed and up on my wall. My most recent aquisition (if you can call it that) was getting the Huron County Museum to send me digital images of a few in their possession - so I have printed those and just need to frame them to add to my collection. These photos are sort of special because they're by a well-known and noted photographer operating in the area in the early part of the 20th c. More about him can be found
HERE.

The photos in question from the Museum are HERE, HERE and HERE.

My mom was always sort of pissed that grandma gave those away. Well, whilst digging around for the other stuff, she found another Sallows. It's not on the website (my grandmother didn't even know she had it) but it's taken around the same time as the rest (1920ish) and shows my grandma (yes, the girl feeding the chickens), my great grandma and my great grandpa in a horse-drawn buggy. It's awesome. My mom promptly took it. She says she's giving it to me, though what exactly I'll do with it I don't know - There's this part of me that loves having the old family photos. And then there's part of me that realizes I'm not entirely able to care for them. So I've contacted a friend that works at the Provincial Archives to see if he knows about any really good digitization facilities so that I can take a copy to send to the Sallows Gallery.

Oh, yes, and my grandmother, having no sense of personal history, was almost impossible to draw out into anecdotes about her own past and her childhood. So I didn't get as much there as I'd hoped. I seriously wish that some of my other grandparents were still alive. Or that even my great grandparents were alive (my great-grandfather lived to almost 99 - he was a couple months short of 99 when he died in 1983... *sigh*).

So, yeah, in the midst of the despair there was a bit of light at least.

On the Friday, my mom and I went to the county Museum. Didn't identify ourselves. Part of the museum has a lot of rotating exhibits, and a lot of the stuff my grandmother donated (like, ok, say, the photos... and some china... and some textiles and some furniture... and a lot more) wasn't on display. The museum was founded by some random eccentric guy back in the middle of the 20th c. as a "pioneer museum". The public historian in me was appalled by his chunk of it (it's expanded and grown one hell of a lot since he gave up control and passed away) since it is a whole sort of general mishmash of stuff, but the more modern bits are much more cohesive and tell a pretty good story of the agricultural and political origins of the area.

For the afternoon, I picked up a brochure and went on a historic walking tour of part of the town for about an hour. It points out various buildings and locations of architectural and historical value, and I took tons of photos (again, you'll have to wait until at least tonight for those), including some of myself in the snazzy new hat that I bought. If I ever had all the money in the world I'd start by buying one of the Georgian houses... I'd restore it and modernize to a certain extent while still being true to the original design elements, and I'd live in it. Then I'd buy another Georgian house. I'd restore it and furnish it entirely in a Georgian manner, and it would be a museum. Preferably with some interpreters. Then I'd buy a Victorian house. And do the same thing. And then an Edwardian. And then the Craftsman that I saw on the way out today. And... and... *sigh*

It was like walking down memory lane, though. I spent all my summers in this place as a kid and I don't know when I'm going to get back. I mean, I'm super glad to be coming back to my apartment. I really need a good night's sleep. But I do miss that side of the country and wish I still got to spend time there on a more frequent basis. The problem is that if I get a job out there, I don't want it to be used as an excuse to look after my grandmother. I'd have no problem going to see her for a weekend every couple of months or so, but I don't want to have to be her caregiver. Granted, my mother's not exactly young either (she's only a year shy of 60) but I'd rather not have to look after an aged parent figure until I have to. The prospect is extremely daunting, and it absolutely saddens me to think about it.

Ok, we're supposed to start boarding in about 15 minutes, so I'll put the computer away and maybe read for the next bit - I've rambled on enough.

Labels: dreams, genealogy, history, life, negativity 1 comments |

Of exhaustion

Kate Mc

Ladies and gentlemen, I am exhausted. And I mean that. Really freaking exhausted. I suppose that's what you get for getting up at what is the Alberta equivalent of 4:45 a.m. I mean, yeah, usually I'm up at 5:30, but that's beside the point. Really. After a week of exhausting nights working on rehearsals for the Requiem, and now this... I just about fell asleep in the taxi on the way here to the airport, where I now sit in a cheesily Canadian-Beer-themed bar, using the wireless internet (apparently my free internet from the hotel doesn't expire until tomorrow, and really, I'm not going to look a gift horse in the mouth, even if the signal here in the airport is shite and it literally took about 5 minutes for the post-typing page to pop up).

I have noticed a few things while in my National Capital.

1) Service here is SO much better than out in Alberta. People still have to compete for jobs here. Every single person who has served me, from the folks at the front desk in the hotel, to the waiter at the restaurant on Sunday night to the staff at the Timothy's where I got my coffee this morning to the guy here in the bar (who's kinda cute, but that's best left for when I'm not typing in a place where he can easily see my screen), to the room service delivery ladies... Fantastic, pleasant, cheerful, prompt service. It has been amazing.

2) Ottawa is about as close to Edinburgh or some other major British city as you're going to get in Canada. Everything centres around one main hill area (ie: Parliament Hill). The Byward market area reminds me of nothing so much as a streetcorner in Edinburgh or London. There are certainly enough pubs around. :) There are statues. Monuments. Buildings more than 100 years old. It is fan-freaking-tastic. I can certainly see myself relocating here and not being too horribly disappointed. Yeah, I'd miss people from out west, but... wow. This is awesome.

3) The Musée des Civilizations is still pretty fantastic. I have some photos of various aspects of it that I want to show you - for a museum that's static (ie: not living history) they certainly cover more than I remember (granted, there have probably been significant changes in the last 12-15 years and additions to the museum that I hadn't noticed when I was a kid). I got to go for about 3.5 hours today in between interviews and it was great.

4) I think I was able to sell myself in ways that employers weren't necessarily expecting. Yeah, a history degree might not be practically applicable to the real world, so I harped on my malleability and my transferrable skills. As I said to several of the interviewers, I'm a ball of clay. Feel free to poke and prod me into whatever you need. I have the basic skills to do it and no preconceived notions of how things "should" be.

I am sort of kicking myself for a few things, though.

a) Didn't think to fly in a few days early and take more time to explore and see friends and such. Getting to see H was fantastic, but there are a couple of others I would have visited here if I could.

b) My French doesn't include flirting 101. They don't teach you how to flirt with men in standard French classes. And there were some very cute francophone men at these interviews. And they all have Masters' degrees, so you know they're smart. And by tonight, I was too exhausted to think clearly enough to even TRY to flirt with the cute guy from Québec that I shared a taxi to the airport with.

c) I'm not a more gregarious person. Some of those people could just walk up to anyone and start a conversation, then there's me. None of that capacity here. I think the people in the interviews were surprised when I described myself as shy at first. If people are asking me questions and I'm forced to respond, it's not as difficult as just walking up to some random and saying hi. Ah well.

Ok, I should probably actually eat the food on the table in front of me, and read the news or something productive like that... Photos will follow early next week, hopefully some good ones of the town my grandma lives in and such as well as some Ottawa ones...

4 comments |

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Ok, seriously now...

Thursday, January 11, 2007

You know it's a slow day at work when...

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