So I've been home less than 48 hours, and my mother and I have already managed to have a... well, not quite a fight... but a definite disagreement. She knew, and I knew, that it wasn't going to be convenient having me live at home again. The house is really only meant for two people - it isn't quite big enough for three (ok, that's a lie, it's plenty big, but it really doesn't FEEL that way).
I have no job, and don't want to be stuck doing something I hate. I've been offered my Park Hosting position back, which, while the pay is shit, is at least something I enjoyed doing - a position with good company. Enter the big dilemma. The park is 35 minutes drive away from this house out in the suburbs, the bus service is shit (ie: doesn't run after 7 p.m.), and we only have one vehicle between the three of us. I mentioned the very possibility of getting that job back and was basically told that having to have the vehicle on evenings and weekends to get to that job would pretty much ruin my mother's routine and that it was completely unacceptable
Well, what the fuck does she expect?!?! If I get a service job or anything that's not within walking distance of this house, I'm going to need a vehicle and that's all there is to it. And unless I'm working 9-5, which is highly unlikely if I have to take a retail or service job, that's going to involve evenings and weekends. I haven't accepted M's offer of my PH job back yet, but I'd rather be doing that than working in some soulless corporate retail chain at the Sherwood Park Mall, and my mother doesn't seem to understand that sometimes money ISN'T everything.
I volunteered for Spook again this year, since I wanted to do something productive with my gainful unemployedness, and the battle over that has already started raging. Yes, it's 4 evenings this coming week, and maybe Monday afternoon, but it's not like I'm doing anything else, and if I just sit here in this house all week, I'll go absolutely fucking nuts.
I'm already feeling like the biggest imposition on earth, and I don't have the money to move out to a more convenient location yet. I'm stuck. Completely and utterly stuck. 48 hours and my life is turned into an absolute hell already. I'm afraid to drink the last cup of coffee from the pot, afraid to move anything, afraid to use anything, afraid to upset their precious routine. It was like this last summer as well, and I don't want to have to go through this again.
I have no job, and don't want to be stuck doing something I hate. I've been offered my Park Hosting position back, which, while the pay is shit, is at least something I enjoyed doing - a position with good company. Enter the big dilemma. The park is 35 minutes drive away from this house out in the suburbs, the bus service is shit (ie: doesn't run after 7 p.m.), and we only have one vehicle between the three of us. I mentioned the very possibility of getting that job back and was basically told that having to have the vehicle on evenings and weekends to get to that job would pretty much ruin my mother's routine and that it was completely unacceptable
Well, what the fuck does she expect?!?! If I get a service job or anything that's not within walking distance of this house, I'm going to need a vehicle and that's all there is to it. And unless I'm working 9-5, which is highly unlikely if I have to take a retail or service job, that's going to involve evenings and weekends. I haven't accepted M's offer of my PH job back yet, but I'd rather be doing that than working in some soulless corporate retail chain at the Sherwood Park Mall, and my mother doesn't seem to understand that sometimes money ISN'T everything.
I volunteered for Spook again this year, since I wanted to do something productive with my gainful unemployedness, and the battle over that has already started raging. Yes, it's 4 evenings this coming week, and maybe Monday afternoon, but it's not like I'm doing anything else, and if I just sit here in this house all week, I'll go absolutely fucking nuts.
I'm already feeling like the biggest imposition on earth, and I don't have the money to move out to a more convenient location yet. I'm stuck. Completely and utterly stuck. 48 hours and my life is turned into an absolute hell already. I'm afraid to drink the last cup of coffee from the pot, afraid to move anything, afraid to use anything, afraid to upset their precious routine. It was like this last summer as well, and I don't want to have to go through this again.
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Welcome home... I'm sure this whole thing is going to end up working out for you. It just sucks for now.
well shit.
Don't worry, I'm not going to say things will get back to normal, because I'm sure that things, and you, have changed, but I'm sure you'll find that it will all fit together again.
I have a couch, but no food...you're welcome to crash any time.
I agree, it will work out. But I also know how crappy it is to feel trapped, so there's a spare room in the basement and decent bus service if you feel a little squished (and there's always too much coffee in the pot, so your welcome to it).
between the changes you went through abroad and the changes that no doubt have happened here at home...finding normality is really hard. i speak from experience. but eventually you will find your place again--take advantage of your friends, you're very lucky to have them around with all their support.
(((Hugs)))). This sucks, Kate, but I agree with the others: in time you and your parents will have got used to each other again.
Get a job, any job, and then your own place. Soon. Then you will be able to spend quality time with the family and not have to go through all the arguments and frustrations that go with living together. Shame you've left the UK, but the weather here is pretty bad right now....
Will keep an eye on events, I'm sure it won't take long to get sorted back home. Enjoy!
Kate - Sorry to hear this. But take some comfort in the fact you're not rushing into anything JUST SO YOU'RE NOT LIVING AT HOME AGAIN. I admit that taking the job at Ecoplans didn't really sit right with me at the time last November, but... I felt like I had to. In some ways, if I did it over again, I would go home, take a load off, look carefully and thoroughly at what was out there, and choose something I knew I could thrive with. Ecoplans will not keep me for longer than 1 year 8 months. The ground is NOT fertile for growth.
Amy