So I was going to be really good and keep posting my journal entries as I wrote them, but it just didn't work out - I've left the journal at work (which, after all, is what it's about) and will continue to write as things come to me. This whole process is supposed to be about a lot of personal introspection, which is something I'm not particularly good at... but whatever.
So. Ottawa was superfun, even if I didn't get to play tourist. Lots of good people, lots of decent beer (oops, probably shouldn't have mentioned that - but don't worry, it was on our own tabs, not the government's, we're not wasting the taxpayers' money...).
Job is still going ok. I'm learning. I'm slowly doing as well. Yes, doing. Which is pretty exciting. I'm slowly gaining some responsibility. Although I'm still not 100% on top of what's going on, it's getting there. We're heading down to Calgary and Lethbridge next week to visit some of the field offices. There's going to be at least one, if not two trips to Vancouver (one may just be a fly-in, fly-out sort of thing, not even an overnight stay), at least one, if not two trips to Ottawa (one for training, one, maybe, for some conference with our department), and potentially a trip to Inuvik or Iqaluit - all before Christmas! Not that I'll get to see much, but at least I can add a few pins to my figurative online map -I've never been to Van or to any of the territories before.
Choir has started again for the year. We're doing Handel's "Solomon" Oratorio in November. More info can be found at www.richardeatonsingers.com. There are some pretty big names in Canadian music coming out to be the soloists, so it should be a great night.
I've started taking piano lessons again - apparently one of the biggest problems I'm having is just self-confidence, but what can you do? That will just take time to build, I guess.
I have yet again discovered that a guy I'm interested in is now in a relationship. And obviously not with me. Go figure (yes, for those of you who know me on facebook, this is the reason for my status currently). Probably for the best, given some of the circumstances surrounding things, but this is getting to be a pattern, and I'm not impressed. Anyone have any single male friends they can introduce me to? *sigh* Maybe it's time to resort to eharmony... Although I'd probably not even make it past the personality tests (just google "eharmony rejects" for more on how their process works - it's not exactly the most fair in the world, or check out this link: http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2005-05-18-eharmony_x.htm). At this point I just feel more defeated than devastated, which is kind of a nice change. If you can say that feeling defeated is nice. Ah well.
I have cleaned my bathroom. It is now sparkling. It won't last, but it's nice for the moment. I should probably tackle the rest of my apartment, but I'm not sure that I will.
Went out last night for a surprise party for a friend's going-away (she's heading off for a 9-week course at the beginning of October, so we likely won't see her again until close to Christmas). Had a great dinner with great people, went out dancing a bit afterwards... and was reminded why I don't go out dancing much any more. I felt old. And I'm feeling slightly hung over this morning, which can't be right, since I only had 3 drinks over the course of the night... I'm hoping I'm not getting sick.
But, in all honesty, all the minor inconveniences aside, life has been pretty not bad lately. I found someone to go to the gym with, and when your gym membership at the building you work in is only $40/year, I have no excuse NOT to join, really. I'm hoping that feeling a little better physically will help with feeling a little better emotionally. I've been making time to hang out with friends, and there are some that I need to get in touch with and arrange things (sorry, Magnolia, I keep meaning to contact you, I'm horrible...). There are so many new beginnings right now both in my life and around me that it's almost impossible not to feel oddly optimistic.
So. Ottawa was superfun, even if I didn't get to play tourist. Lots of good people, lots of decent beer (oops, probably shouldn't have mentioned that - but don't worry, it was on our own tabs, not the government's, we're not wasting the taxpayers' money...).
Job is still going ok. I'm learning. I'm slowly doing as well. Yes, doing. Which is pretty exciting. I'm slowly gaining some responsibility. Although I'm still not 100% on top of what's going on, it's getting there. We're heading down to Calgary and Lethbridge next week to visit some of the field offices. There's going to be at least one, if not two trips to Vancouver (one may just be a fly-in, fly-out sort of thing, not even an overnight stay), at least one, if not two trips to Ottawa (one for training, one, maybe, for some conference with our department), and potentially a trip to Inuvik or Iqaluit - all before Christmas! Not that I'll get to see much, but at least I can add a few pins to my figurative online map -I've never been to Van or to any of the territories before.
Choir has started again for the year. We're doing Handel's "Solomon" Oratorio in November. More info can be found at www.richardeatonsingers.com. There are some pretty big names in Canadian music coming out to be the soloists, so it should be a great night.
I've started taking piano lessons again - apparently one of the biggest problems I'm having is just self-confidence, but what can you do? That will just take time to build, I guess.
I have yet again discovered that a guy I'm interested in is now in a relationship. And obviously not with me. Go figure (yes, for those of you who know me on facebook, this is the reason for my status currently). Probably for the best, given some of the circumstances surrounding things, but this is getting to be a pattern, and I'm not impressed. Anyone have any single male friends they can introduce me to? *sigh* Maybe it's time to resort to eharmony... Although I'd probably not even make it past the personality tests (just google "eharmony rejects" for more on how their process works - it's not exactly the most fair in the world, or check out this link: http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2005-05-18-eharmony_x.htm). At this point I just feel more defeated than devastated, which is kind of a nice change. If you can say that feeling defeated is nice. Ah well.
I have cleaned my bathroom. It is now sparkling. It won't last, but it's nice for the moment. I should probably tackle the rest of my apartment, but I'm not sure that I will.
Went out last night for a surprise party for a friend's going-away (she's heading off for a 9-week course at the beginning of October, so we likely won't see her again until close to Christmas). Had a great dinner with great people, went out dancing a bit afterwards... and was reminded why I don't go out dancing much any more. I felt old. And I'm feeling slightly hung over this morning, which can't be right, since I only had 3 drinks over the course of the night... I'm hoping I'm not getting sick.
But, in all honesty, all the minor inconveniences aside, life has been pretty not bad lately. I found someone to go to the gym with, and when your gym membership at the building you work in is only $40/year, I have no excuse NOT to join, really. I'm hoping that feeling a little better physically will help with feeling a little better emotionally. I've been making time to hang out with friends, and there are some that I need to get in touch with and arrange things (sorry, Magnolia, I keep meaning to contact you, I'm horrible...). There are so many new beginnings right now both in my life and around me that it's almost impossible not to feel oddly optimistic.
Just hearing the word "conflict" makes me uneasy. What am I worried about?
- Escalating conflict to the point where relationships deteriorate
- Tension at home and at work
- Putting myself out there
Without censoring myself, I would complete the following sentence with...
"In the presence of conflict, I have a tendency to..."
- Concede quickly.
What connection can I make between my response and my Myers Briggs profile?
My introversion is definitely highlighted in the dominant ways in which I react to conflict.
Thanks to the KCSI theory, I learned that it is possible to be more effective when conflicts arise. What ideas struck me the most?
- I need not to be as fearful of conflict as long as I reflect on what I am going to say.
- The importance of "I" statements is as huge as ever.
- There are different ways of dealing with conflict, each effective in their time and place.
To become a more effective leader with regard to conflict resolution, I have decided to take certain actions. These include:
- Being more proactive in spotting conflict before it escalates.
- Not being afraid to be a director on occasion as the case requires.
- Learn to compromise more, whether in a cooperative way or a compromise way.
- Escalating conflict to the point where relationships deteriorate
- Tension at home and at work
- Putting myself out there
Without censoring myself, I would complete the following sentence with...
"In the presence of conflict, I have a tendency to..."
- Concede quickly.
What connection can I make between my response and my Myers Briggs profile?
My introversion is definitely highlighted in the dominant ways in which I react to conflict.
Thanks to the KCSI theory, I learned that it is possible to be more effective when conflicts arise. What ideas struck me the most?
- I need not to be as fearful of conflict as long as I reflect on what I am going to say.
- The importance of "I" statements is as huge as ever.
- There are different ways of dealing with conflict, each effective in their time and place.
To become a more effective leader with regard to conflict resolution, I have decided to take certain actions. These include:
- Being more proactive in spotting conflict before it escalates.
- Not being afraid to be a director on occasion as the case requires.
- Learn to compromise more, whether in a cooperative way or a compromise way.
So to continue from yesterday...
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator
Did I recognize myself in the results? What surprised me? What did I discover? What did the results confirm?
Hells yes, I recognized myself. I have always known that I was a fairly introverted person, more interested in facts than in imagination. Having done similar personality tests in the past, I was not particularly surprised by the results of this one. It simply confirmed what I already believed about myself.
Taking a step back, I reflect on my profile to gain a better understanding of who I am.
Where does my energy stem from?
My energy comes internally. I am an introvert. I rejuvenate by getting away from crowds and doing things alone - taking a long, hot bath, reading a good book, etc.
What is my automatic approach to understanding a situation?
I like facts. Details. Give me more information. Be straightforward. Follow the agenda. Do not make me rely on the abstract - give me concrete details and information.
How do I naturally arrive at an opinion?
I am a thinker. I need lists of pros and cons. I need to do things objectively and critically. Emotion plays a secondary role in my decisions.
What is my natural approach to action?
I need to create schedules, timetables, and deadlines. I prefer to have advance notice of things. I concentrate on task completion, and need ongoing feedback about results and achievements.
When I learned of my entire cohort's results, what fascinated me? Do I feel that different profiles will cause conflicts within the learning groups?
I was not surprised at where I stood in the group. I always knew I was an introvert. I was actually more surprised that there were other ISTJ individuals in addition to myself. I do not think it will be a conflict to work with these individuals so long as we use our differences in complementary rather than contradictory ways.
I identify the strengths and weaknesses in my profile. I define certain areas I will need to work on to become a better leader.
I need to work on my introversion. I need to know that it is ok to be more of an extrovert and to take further charge in certain situations and put myself out there at risk of criticism. I will need to learn to be more flexible and less reliant on rules and regulations and previous ways of doing things. I will need to lose my personal rigidity, to a certain extent.
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator
Did I recognize myself in the results? What surprised me? What did I discover? What did the results confirm?
Hells yes, I recognized myself. I have always known that I was a fairly introverted person, more interested in facts than in imagination. Having done similar personality tests in the past, I was not particularly surprised by the results of this one. It simply confirmed what I already believed about myself.
Taking a step back, I reflect on my profile to gain a better understanding of who I am.
Where does my energy stem from?
My energy comes internally. I am an introvert. I rejuvenate by getting away from crowds and doing things alone - taking a long, hot bath, reading a good book, etc.
What is my automatic approach to understanding a situation?
I like facts. Details. Give me more information. Be straightforward. Follow the agenda. Do not make me rely on the abstract - give me concrete details and information.
How do I naturally arrive at an opinion?
I am a thinker. I need lists of pros and cons. I need to do things objectively and critically. Emotion plays a secondary role in my decisions.
What is my natural approach to action?
I need to create schedules, timetables, and deadlines. I prefer to have advance notice of things. I concentrate on task completion, and need ongoing feedback about results and achievements.
When I learned of my entire cohort's results, what fascinated me? Do I feel that different profiles will cause conflicts within the learning groups?
I was not surprised at where I stood in the group. I always knew I was an introvert. I was actually more surprised that there were other ISTJ individuals in addition to myself. I do not think it will be a conflict to work with these individuals so long as we use our differences in complementary rather than contradictory ways.
I identify the strengths and weaknesses in my profile. I define certain areas I will need to work on to become a better leader.
I need to work on my introversion. I need to know that it is ok to be more of an extrovert and to take further charge in certain situations and put myself out there at risk of criticism. I will need to learn to be more flexible and less reliant on rules and regulations and previous ways of doing things. I will need to lose my personal rigidity, to a certain extent.
So I'm Ottawa on a training session for my new job. It's only been the first day, and in all honesty, it wasn't too bad. On a completely random note, I had to buy new shoes, since I discovered a pretty massive hole in one of my casual sneakers. Which hurt. PST sucks. But what can you do?
I was hoping to meet some friends for dinner and such while I was here - it hasn't worked out as of yet. M and I were hoping to meet tonight, but he's all governmenty and important and such, and had to work late... P and M and I will hopefully all get together tomorrow night - bit of a reunion (P was my boss 6 years ago when I was still in school, and M was her boss... we all worked in the residences).
Anywho, back to the training. We did the MBTI (Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator) test, learned about each other, and generally sort of discussed leadership in the most general sense possible (how's that for a redundant sentence?).
It was all good, until we hit the last little bit of the day, and they handed us our journals. Our journals have a name. It's Latin for faithful. The journal has an introduction written in 1st person. As in, "Hi, I'm your journal! Write in me because...". And there's a page just inside the cover for us to colour. Seriously.
However, in the interests of participation, here goes nothing - I've written this in my actual paper journal as well, but it's always interesting to hear feedback on what others have to say or what others think about me and my experiences and their experiences.
1. Following the ice-breaker activity and after meeting my colleagues, what remarks affected me the most? What am I feeling right now?
After meeting my colleagues, and learning about their backgrounds and situations, their assignments, and motivations, I am feeling less alone than I was going into this. There are many similar experiences, questions, logistical nightmares, etc.
2. Who in the group caught my attention? Who am I eager to speak with? Why?
I am excited to speak with the other candidates that are closer to my age. My supervisors are not quite the same age as my parents, but they are certainly getting there - definitely boomers or very early gen Xers rather than gen Yers or millenials (for which I'm thankful, seriously). While they are certainly friendly, helpful, and kind, they are at a very different place in their lives than I am, and I'm glad to have some people also just out of school, also trying to figure out what they want from life, that I could see becoming my friends.
I am also quite glad to meet some francophones. It's been too long since I used my French on a regular basis.
3. I would use the following words to describe my cohort.
4. Am I ready to achieve greater balance in my life? What commitments should I make to ensure personal wellness?
Yes -
Further thoughts...
At this point, I'm just glad that people are friendly. When I was attending the interviews for this position, there were a few people that seemed friendly and nice, but they were difficult to approach or to come by. I am quite happy that my cohort is so open, friendly, accepting of differences. Coming into this trip, it felt like going back to school. It was like... wondering if your classmates are going to like you. Wondering who's going to be your friend. Wondering if the classes are going to be too hard (so far the homework was pretty easy!). Now that I'm here, I think I'm going to be all right.
I was hoping to meet some friends for dinner and such while I was here - it hasn't worked out as of yet. M and I were hoping to meet tonight, but he's all governmenty and important and such, and had to work late... P and M and I will hopefully all get together tomorrow night - bit of a reunion (P was my boss 6 years ago when I was still in school, and M was her boss... we all worked in the residences).
Anywho, back to the training. We did the MBTI (Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator) test, learned about each other, and generally sort of discussed leadership in the most general sense possible (how's that for a redundant sentence?).
It was all good, until we hit the last little bit of the day, and they handed us our journals. Our journals have a name. It's Latin for faithful. The journal has an introduction written in 1st person. As in, "Hi, I'm your journal! Write in me because...". And there's a page just inside the cover for us to colour. Seriously.
However, in the interests of participation, here goes nothing - I've written this in my actual paper journal as well, but it's always interesting to hear feedback on what others have to say or what others think about me and my experiences and their experiences.
1. Following the ice-breaker activity and after meeting my colleagues, what remarks affected me the most? What am I feeling right now?
After meeting my colleagues, and learning about their backgrounds and situations, their assignments, and motivations, I am feeling less alone than I was going into this. There are many similar experiences, questions, logistical nightmares, etc.
2. Who in the group caught my attention? Who am I eager to speak with? Why?
I am excited to speak with the other candidates that are closer to my age. My supervisors are not quite the same age as my parents, but they are certainly getting there - definitely boomers or very early gen Xers rather than gen Yers or millenials (for which I'm thankful, seriously). While they are certainly friendly, helpful, and kind, they are at a very different place in their lives than I am, and I'm glad to have some people also just out of school, also trying to figure out what they want from life, that I could see becoming my friends.
I am also quite glad to meet some francophones. It's been too long since I used my French on a regular basis.
3. I would use the following words to describe my cohort.
- Fun
- Outgoing
- Intelligent
- Motivated
- Helpful
- Enthusiastic
4. Am I ready to achieve greater balance in my life? What commitments should I make to ensure personal wellness?
Yes -
- I will ask questions when in doubt.
- I will do my best to leave work at work.
- I will maintain my extra-curricular interests
- I will take time to hang out with friends
- I will take that couple of days off at Christmas.
Further thoughts...
At this point, I'm just glad that people are friendly. When I was attending the interviews for this position, there were a few people that seemed friendly and nice, but they were difficult to approach or to come by. I am quite happy that my cohort is so open, friendly, accepting of differences. Coming into this trip, it felt like going back to school. It was like... wondering if your classmates are going to like you. Wondering who's going to be your friend. Wondering if the classes are going to be too hard (so far the homework was pretty easy!). Now that I'm here, I think I'm going to be all right.
